Growing up, many of us heard the familiar phrase at the dinner table: “You’re not leaving until your plate is empty!” While this might have seemed like a harmless way for parents to encourage us to eat all our vegetables, it may actually have had some unintended consequences. For many, this habit lingers into adulthood, contributing to overeating and, in some cases, weight gain.

The Problem with “Finishing Your Plate”

By telling us we have to finish everything on our plates, adults may have unknowingly taught us to override our natural hunger cues. This mindset can then follow us into adulthood. Whether it’s because of portion sizes that are far larger than we need or the idea that wasting food is bad, many of us still feel compelled to clean our plates—even when we’re no longer hungry. The problem? This can lead to overeating, weight gain, and a complicated relationship with food.

Why It Sticks With Us

Portion Distortion: Over the years, portion sizes have increased significantly, especially in restaurants. If you were taught to always finish your plate, it’s easy to eat far more than you need without even realising it.
Guilt and Waste: Many of us were raised to believe that wasting food is wrong, whether due to financial reasons or the knowledge that others are less fortunate. This guilt can push us to finish everything, even when we’re no longer enjoying it.
Emotional Ties: Food isn’t just fuel; it’s deeply tied to emotions, memories, and family traditions. Being asked to finish your plate may evoke feelings of nostalgia, connection, or even pressure to meet expectations.

What You Can Do About It

If you recognise this habit in yourself, the good news is that it’s entirely possible to reframe your relationship with food and portion sizes. Here’s how:

Listen to Your Body: Pay attention to your hunger and fullness cues. It’s okay to leave food on your plate if you’re full. Try eating more mindfully by focusing on the taste, texture, and experience of the food, rather than just trying to clear your plate.
Smaller Portions: Serve yourself smaller portions to begin with. You can always go back for more if you’re still hungry, but starting small can help prevent overeating. Don’t be afraid to take half of a restaurant meal home or share dishes with others.
Challenge the Guilt: Feeling guilty about leaving food can be a tough habit to break, but remember that you’re not wasting food by not eating it—especially if you’re full. It’s more wasteful to overeat and harm your health than to leave a bit behind.
Reprogramme Your Thinking: If you were raised with the “finish your plate” mindset, it can take time to change how you think about food. Remind yourself that it’s okay to stop eating when you’re satisfied, even if there’s food left. It’s about nourishing your body, not punishing it.

A New Approach to Your Mealtime

Changing a lifetime of habits can be challenging, but it’s definitely possible. Start by tuning in to your body and its signals, rather than following old rules about food. By giving yourself permission to stop eating when you’re full, you’ll not only feel better, but you’ll likely find that your relationship with food becomes healthier, too.

What to Do if You’re a Parent

I’ve thought carefully about whether to offer advice here for parents. The truth is though, as much as I could write a load of tips, I’m REALLY not keen on telling anyone how to raise their children. Being a parent is tough, especially when it comes to getting kids to eat, and you don’t need some coach preaching at you!

The only thing I would like to share, I think, is that children often mimic the behaviour they observe in their parents. If they see you eating mindfully, stopping when you’re full, and maintaining a balanced relationship with food, they’re more likely to develop those habits as they grow up. Of course, that doesn’t make it any less frustrating when they suddenly refuse the meal today that they loved last week, leaving you torn between not wanting to waste the food and the money you spent on it!!!

If your own parents told you to “finish your plate” I am sure it came from a good place, and no one should ever be judged for that!

So, I’ll leave it at that, but I hope you have found this blog useful still.

Over and out.